It's All Goodnow

I'm at the gym the other day.  Pumping iron.  Getting all huge and jacked and ...oh, hold on, I'm training for a marathon, scratch that.  I was getting my cardio in (that sounds far less macho, but whatever)   I get done sweating for the day and go to the locker room.  Standing at the sink splashing water on my face when a guy walks in with a suit on that is all comic book characters.  Super heroes mostly.  But it is a suit.  Full on pants, sports coat....suit.  I am tired and live in New York so I don't think a whole lot of it until he busts out a tube of lipstick and starts going all Buffalo Bill style.  I sort of look over ... give him the once over.  He looks back at me and says: "It's OK, I'm a clown." To which I responded, "Oh, didn't even notice." My question: why is a clown using the gym locker room to get ready for a gig?  That upped the creepy factor by about 4.  Clowns are weird.  Never liked them. 

One of the true downfalls of NYC living is the laundromat.  There is almost nothing I dislike more than having to haul my laundry across the street.  (Yes, I know that less than 75 years ago people "washed" their clothing in rivers and on rocks, but I live in 2014, not 1934)  And that's just it, it isn't like I have to bring my laundry bag a mile to this place, uphill both ways.  It is across the street.  I can actually hit the building from my front door with  a decent throw of a tennis ball. So today I go to do my laundry and the price to do a load of wash has risen a whopping 25 cents.  I took a deep breath and told myself that it is OK despite the machines always breaking and the people who own the place (perhaps the most miserable humans ever.  It is two parents and a grown son running the place and it should be called Misery Laundry.  These people hate their lives.  The son stands outside and smokes all day.  The man looks like his wife beats him and the wife

NFL - bunch of class acts right there. Whew. Way to attempt to fuck up a multi billion dollar business.....  Seriously the NFL is actively trying to make people not want to watch its product.  My guess is that sales of pink jerseys will be declining steadily. Coffee place across the street from work started selling pizza.  Not sure what that's all about.  Nothing goes with my iced coffee like nice greasy slice of pepperoni.  The fuck are they thinking? I am still wearing shorts.  That's about to end.  Because winter is coming.  And I do not like that. Running the NYC marathon again.  So that's terrible.  $266.  $11 processing fee.  Please explain that to me.  Please.  Fucking please....why is there an $11 processing fee. Jesus.

Ernest Hemingway is credited with penning the shortest short story. For Sale: Babies shoes, never worn. I wonder what six word stories Hemingway would write about the NFL?  So I am going to take the liberty of writing a few in his place. For Sale: Rice jersey, riding dirty. Rice jersey, free: Wash before use. Help Wanted: NE TE, no priores. Aaron Hernandez: 162,000 Twitter followers....... still. file:///Users/andrewgoodnow/Desktop/Screen%20Shot%202014-09-08%20at%209.33.29%20PM.png Needed: NFL Commissioner, Must have balls. Butt fumble, so funny, it hurts. <iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/Vuvz15OjCVc?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> Peyton Manning, best advertising personality: ever. <iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/cSuHQZjzJYY?feature=player_detailpage" frameborder="0" allow